Come on! Kick My Hornet's Nest Already!

"A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others."-Ayn Rand

What was dormant in me is reawakened when I was hit by lightning and metaphorical lightning struck twice yesterday and today.

So, the synergy of it all is great, starting yesterday with my awakening to a Samoan writer, Lani Wendt Young. I haven’t read her work (yet), just the freebie on Amazon and I'm ready for more. I did read her blog, liked her on Facebook page and checked out her list of works. Her books are in my shopping cart and after my move to Washington State this fall, I will add her to my library. Lani self-published a trilogy Telesa and When Water Burns so far, among other works.

I identify with her struggles as a writer, mom and Islander Goddess. Her young adult novels center on a Samoan heroine, which in itself is needed. Check out her blog SleeplessinSamoa here.

So, I hopped on (that's a dainty description-let's say attacked) my manuscripts yesterday. One, in its third draft has found itself being passed around friends and family for critique. I describe this novel as my “ugly baby” which is terrible, but when a writer thinks their first draft is gorgeous and perfect and can do no wrong—well, then he/she is setting themselves up for disappointment. I learned this the hard way when I sent out first drafts to about 10 agents…FIRST DRAFT! Rookie mistake in 2009. Several agents gave me useful feedback, but now I realize that time, review, a thick skin and openness to honest criticism were necessary (oh, and chocolate). I couldn’t learn this quickly. It takes time, for a mom and wife, years even.

So, almost three years later, I’ve given the full manuscript to one friend and boldly asked a cousin I admire to read and slaughter as necessary yesterday--again, because of Lani. And, I'm further pushed because my cousin/beta reader/literary soul sister has given me back gold--criticism, suggestions and praise I can be fueled by. So, I’m eager to start anew. Looking at my project with fresh eyes. Living and breathing and loving the characters and world I created again. I don’t like to call myself a romantic writer, but I am. My depiction of love is humorous, warped and with flaws, but it’s my universe and I’m glad I can create and share. After another few drafts, I think I’ll be ready to get back in line to cha cha with real world agents.

It’s easy for me to shelf my writing projects. Of course, motherhood-wifehood-domestic goddesshood take precedence. But, once I feel unbalanced and the other “children” cry for me…I have to attend to them. I don’t garden or bake or sew or do music, I write. So, the flood gates have opened with new inspiration, new purpose and new direction. I’m buzzing with excitement, so much so that I’ve done more in two days than I have in the last month-writing wise. I’m coming down from a Comic Con high from a few weeks ago, so that experience is weaving into a new book idea I drafted today. It could change. One thing I know for sure, that my first draft won’t be perfect, but it will get done. Happy writing or sewing or gardening or whatever you love to you all.

Esta later!

Comic Con 2012/Twilight-Breaking Dawn Thursday Mission Accomplished

I am so tired.

Just a quick post about the fun I had at today's Comic Con 2012 in San Diego. I attended last year and sat in line for 6 hours for the Breaking Dawn 1 Panel. This year was double the time, with my sister-in-law. So being awake for going on 48 hours with a slice of sleep on the grass here and there was well worth it. The final cast panel included Robert Pattinson (my fave), Taylor Lautner, Kristen Stewart, Mackenzie Foy, the Cullen family and the many covens. I was also excited to see Stephenie Meyer herself. We were treated to the first seven minutes of Breaking Dawn II as well as an additional scene. The cast was funny and insightful. I'm happy I had a chance to experience this two years in a row, even if we missed the 9PM line visit by most of the cast, the free posters, etc. This Twilight Thursday at Comic Con was exhausting and rewarding all at the same time.

Here are a few of my pics from my experience before I fade to black....

San Diego Convention Center, my view at 4AM.

England shirt, splendor in the grass, ouch my a**!

The cast of Twilight Breaking Dawn II.

Meeting the Covens.

Stephenie Meyer, author with 'Renesme'-Mackenzie Foy.

Shark Boy turn Wolf Man.

Cullen Couples.

Ending with Rob.
Added these videos for posterity sake:

The Fabulous Blog Ribbon Award for me?

I have been awarded the Fabulous Blog Ribbon award by Kat at
mom-uncensored.blogspot.com

Thank you, Kat. Thank you for taking the time to explore my blog, to know our Chamorro greeting, “Hafa Adai!”--that was impressive and touched me more than you know. It’s good to know my little blog, Guam Goddess in Training can make waves outside of my relatives and friends. So, my numbers have increased by two followers and that is sweet. Also, it's nice that people deliberately check out my blog, and not just because the labels include the words, "Bruce" + "Lee" or "Brandon". (The posts with the most views).

In addition, there is a strange correlation with my real estate search of homes for sale in Granite Falls and this award. I've been researching life in Granite Falls just before Kat (of Granite Falls) bestowed this ribbon on my blog(cue eerie music)…even my husband chuckled when I told him about the Ribbon and where she lives. We Navy Folk have orders to move to Washington State come fall, I digress…(update: Kat is Chamorro!).

In order to receive this award you have to follow a few rules:

1. POST THE RULES ON YOUR BLOG
2. NAME 5 OF YOUR MOST FABULOUS MOMENTS EITHER IN REAL LIFE OR IN THE BLOGOSPHERE
3. NAME 5 THINGS YOU LOVE
4. NAME 5 THINGS YOU HATE
5. PASS THE RIBBON ON TO 5 OTHER BLOGGERS


5 FABULOUS MOMENTS

1. completing my education (high school/college/martial arts/traffic school/cooking rice/tying shoe laces/potty training)
2. falling in love with my now husband
3. birth of son
4. birth of daughter
5. seeing Robert Pattinson in person at Comic Con 2011 (and now 2012)…word.


5 THINGS I LOVE

1. family
2. friends who are like my sisters
3. writing
4. chocolate
5. Bruce Lee


5 THINGS I HATE

1. People who don’t listen
2. ignorance
3. cheaters
4. un-punctuality
5. bad books/movies


5 BLOGGERS I AWARD THE FABULOUS BLOG RIBBON AWARD TO:


1. http://mommysjourney.blogspot.com/
2. http://www.thedrowningmermaid.com/
3. http://paleric.blogspot.com/
4. http://craigsantosperez.wordpress.com/
5. http://www.robsessedpattinson.com/

Bottle It Up! Library + Post Office = Memories

I love the smell of two places, the library and the Post Office (because it reminds me of the library). Why? I’m figuring it’s the collective smell of paper. I recently joined Pinterest and it became another means to explore what I want in my life, and maybe a bit of a time waster when all I can do is “pin” a picture and post (zombie brain days I call them)—but it got me to blogging today, so that’s a plus. And one of my boards in Pintrest is entitled, My Library. It’s a virtual bulletin board of my dream home library and awesome crafty bookshelves I hope to acquire one day. Lord knows I have enough books to fill them. Confession, I was at the secondhand book store at the La Mesa library. The kind elderly volunteer watched me and my children with interest as I perused, dissuaded my children from buying a recipe book for bread or grammar usage (shocking) and found nothing I really needed or wanted, even if I lingered a bit too long on a paperback copy of Bridget Jones’s Diary (I own a copy already as well as the movie). But, I had to argue with my brain that just because the book was 80 meager cents, I didn’t have to possess it. So, proudly we walked out empty handed.

Now, back to the library. I was once a library aide in the 5th grade because I had the “connects” as we say on Guam. My best friend at the time, well her auntie was our librarian at Ordot Elementary School. She got me weekly time to assist. But, for the most part I have memories of the wonderful smell of books in air-conditioning. The metal shelves were cold and gray, but beautiful to me. Don’t get me started on the metal book ends. A specific memory, aside from returning books, playing Donkey Kong on a portable miniature arcade game and perusing literature was building a clubhouse of stacked books. I was in heaven. Another cohort, Jennifer, would build a wall of books around her and I did the same. I would be seated in the corner of two shelves and start building the two walls to box myself in. Where the librarian was at this time and whose idea this was at first is gone from my memory. But, what I do remember is the childhood distortion caused by imagination. Suddenly, this makeshift clubhouse of bookshelves and walls mortared by books that had crisp plastic covers or linen hard covers became the apartment building I would have when I was an adult. I felt safe in my box of books. I remember the smell of that time and place very fondly.

So, living stateside, I found it a luxury to have mail delivered right to my door (saved me the trip to the post office, unless I had a package to send). I didn’t realize an errand such as going to the post office could be missed, that is going to the Hagatna post office on Guam. Every other day, after work at John F. Kennedy High School, I would find an excuse to go off my route home to buy an iced meximocha at Hava Java and walk the maybe 500 feet to the post office to check our family mail. Our entire family shared one post office box. Not just the immediate members, but my grandma, uncles and aunt. I would have to pull out whatever number of letters, look at each one and pull out mine and put the rest back. It probably looked like I was shuffling a deck of cards standing at box 1843. I digress. I will say, post offices smell the same in California as they do on Guam. And, not until I was designated the mail girl for the nonprofit group I work with did I realize, I actually like my weekly trips to the post office. 9 times out of 10, a rooster would crow in the neighborhood in the surrounding hills. That sound makes me smile too. Doors open to the post office, paper smell envelopes me, I walk past boxes that remind me of the ones at home…the ones that used to be opened by combination, a fancy dial in front of each box. I-D-E was our combination. My parents would pull to the curb and I would race up the steps to our box; happy to be trusted with this task. Today, my children join me as I check CHE’LU mail. They too race to the back quadrant which houses our group’s mail. They argue about who is going to turn the key, my son pulls the mail out, my daughter has to close the little door. Post office memories. Library memories.

Try having an olfactory memory with your Kindle/Nook/E-mail.

Found this interesting/somewhat parallel take by author, Christopher Paul Curtis.

“As soon as I got into the library I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I got a whiff of the leather on all the old books, a smell that got real strong if you picked one of them up and stuck your nose real close to it when you turned the pages. Then there was the the smell of the cloth that covered the brand-new books, books that made a splitting sound when you opened them. Then I could sniff the the paper, that soft, powdery, drowsy smell that comes off the page in little puffs when you're reading something or looking at some pictures, kind of hypnotizing smell.

I think it's the smell that makes so many folks fall asleep in the library. You'll see someone turn a page and you can imagine a puff of page powder coming up real slow and easy until it starts piling on a person's eyelashes, weighing their eyes down so much they stay down a little longer after each blink and finally making them so heavy that they just don't come back up at all. Then their mouths open and their heads start bouncing up and down like they're bobbing in a big tub of of water for apples and before you know it... they're out cold and their face thunks smack-dab on the book.

That's the part that makes librarians the maddest. They get real upset if folks start drooling in the books.”

Esta Later!

Nora Ephron, Ray Bradbury…Writers Who Leave a Gaping Hole in the Literary Universe (RIP).

“I don't care who you are. When you sit down to write the first page of your screenplay, in your head, you're also writing your Oscar acceptance speech.”--Nora Ephron

I’ve had a hard time calling myself a WRITER. I’ve had the desire to write, to be a novelist since about 19 years old. My BA is in English and Secondary Education and I have a few self-published notches in my very green belt (with many projects, storylines and first drafts filling notebooks—which hide in corners and special storage bins around my house). Some have seen the light of day and have been revealed to close friends for critique. My hope is to be and do what Ephron and Bradbury did…be a WRITER and embody everything that a wordsmith is responsible for.

When Ray Bradbury died earlier this month, I spent the day really reading up on this writer. I only knew general public domain type facts and was intrigued to learn more about him and his writings. I made a mental note to read Fahrenheit 451 and his other works.

“Don't think. Thinking is the enemy of creativity. It's self-conscious and anything self-conscious is lousy. You can't "try" to do things. You simply "must" do things.”―Ray Bradbury

Today, Nora Ephron has died. She gifted the entertainment/literary world with some great romantic comedies such as When Harry Met Sally, You’ve Got Mail and Sleepless in Seattle. She crafted stories of seemingly ordinary people falling in love in memorable ways. (I’ve always secretly hoped a man would give me a bouquet of pencils, Hello Kitty ones specifically).

Don't you love New York in the fall? It makes me want to buy school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly-sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address. On the other hand, this not knowing has its charms.—Joe to ‘Shopgirl’

Writers are the rock stars in my world. When I like someone’s writing I tend to want to know more about the author. What their upbringing was, what their belief system is, what about them can I find a connection with. For the late Nora Ephron, I appreciate her humor, her take on love and her accomplishment in the writing and movie world. It’s tragic that she is gone…there is a void in literaria (my word for a writer’s universe)….and it should be filled with good writing, not with the likes of 50 Shades of Grey (I digress, I judge, yes, I didn’t read the whole thing, the first 2 chapters of my free Kindle sample were quite enough).

“I try to write parts for women that are as complicated and interesting as women actually are.”--Nora Ephron

With the sad news of Ephron’s passing at the age of 71, I will tackle the dishes, hang with my kids, fold a basket of laundry and make a nutritious dinner this evening, then, I will open the last chapter of the writing project I am currently 2/3’s of the way completed. I will write, even if it’s a page, because as Bradbury says, you must do, not try.

ESTA LATER!

Happy High School Reunion, Y'all!

“No, I didn’t go to your school, I’m just a La Habra Spouse.”--Guam Goddess in Training

I said this a few times this past Saturday evening in Long Beach. My husband and I attended his 20th High School Reunion; La Habra Highlanders threw a nice gathering of over 50 students. We almost didn’t attend this raging party (as raging as 38 year olds can be) because my husband was set to be “underway”…Navy speak for gone. But, as fate and luck and planet aligning would have it, the ship needed some repairs and they pulled back into port. His excited e-mails leading to his return made it seem likely that we would be making the two hour drive north so he could see classmates he hadn’t seen for 20 years. My hunt for trustworthy childcare began…

I attended my 10th High School Reunion in 2002 for George Washington High School. I was on the planning committee and as usual, found myself to be the secretary. It was exciting and easy because I was still living on Guam. It was laidback and maybe a bit anti-climactic since again, I was on Guam and many alumna who attended lived on Guam anyway. Basically, it was normal to run into Geckos at the bank or Payless or a funeral. I remember the group being most excited about people who left the island and were returning after 10 years to attend, my count was 2 back then. Facebook wasn’t a “thing” for us then.




Going to my husband’s reunion was different. I felt his excitement and trepidation. He was emerging a new man, minus the fashionable mullet that many sported. Would they recognize him? He only reconnected with classmates this past year via Facebook and I asked him if he had seen anyone (since 1992) of those who RSVP’d. He said he had not. I reminded him that some people might not recognize him immediately or not at all and not to be offended. I warned him that someone will remember a very specific detail about their past, that he might not. Sure enough, the first classmate he hugged and greeted with a “HEY!” detailed a specific memory…my husband’s face went blank and I laughed. (Told you so, I told him later). I spent the rest of the evening speaking with a wonderful lady. Then, after two hours, I gave in and sat to rest my feet…where I watched people chat it up, I recognized distinct cliques and enjoyed grown men hugging and laughing and drinking and being merry. I could safely say I was the lone Pacific Islander Asian (aside from my hubby) and when his bubbly Japanese classmate entered the scene, she bee lined for me. We shook hands and she was off to get her drink on. A few hours later, she was worried about my being quiet in the corner. I told her I was good. She offered me a drink and I told her I was the designated driver. She then asked where my husband was, I said he was chatting. She was insistent that I not be alone and told me to go to the spouse section (I refused), but like a wedding when the bride gets to shine, my husband was there to shine and reconnect during HIS reunion. She finally left me alone when I said I was fine being “a ninja.” She laughed merrily away.

I realized that being away from Guam for the past 8 years was inching me towards this level of not reconnecting with my classmates since I wasn’t “home”. If airfare was cheaper than the nearly $2,000.00 round trip ticket price to Guam, I would definitely fly home for our August reunion. My husband asked, “What if I bought you a ticket home for your reunion?” My immediate response was no. My next question was what about the kids? He said he would take care of it. I couldn’t, wouldn’t, shouldn’t. If we didn’t all go, or myself and the children at least, then I couldn’t. Imagine my mom’s horror if I went to Guam alone, without her darling grandkids. She wouldn’t have it, along with the countless aunts and uncles and cousins.

I do hope to fly home with all my children and husband in tow for my 25th High School Reunion in 2017. Need to save that salape’ since it may cost about 10K by then for air fare….

I appreciate that I have a special connection with a great group of people of the same age, same experience (or not) from a common place. I hope the reunion on Guam goes great. Onward Geckos!

Our Class Song, GWHS Class of 1992



ESTA LATER!

Dusting off My Michelle Branch CD...

“When I bake something or cook something, it’s just the same feeling as writing a song for me….”—Michelle Branch

Dusting off my Michelle Branch CD has brought me to revisit my ideas of balance, motherhood and creativity.

For the last week, I’ve been playing my Michelle Branch CD (2001-The Spirit Room) in my car. My 4 year old daughter approves. She especially loves, Everywhere, All You Wanted and Goodbye to You—perhaps because I keep sifting through to play them again and again. Her main concern as the melody for the next Branch song starts, “Is this the same girl?”



This album came out around the time I was having a major shift in my relationship, so as the scars of that break-up were healing, Branch’s words were there for me to cling to. Before IPods, I had my enormous CD player on my dresser and often sang along to this very CD.

I Googled Branch yesterday to do my own version of VHI’s Where Are They Now? I was vaguely aware of her switch to country music, since I was busy having my children by this time. Apparently, as Branch was making her appearance in her new form, The Wreckers—a duo, she too was developing her domestic side, marrying her bassist, Teddy and having a child as well.



She’s still gorgeous and I was always intrigued by her lyrics and melodies. Watching her video, Everywhere, ten years ago, my Asian spidey senses tingled and I knew she had Asian pedigree somewhere. I guessed Japanese, but she really is a quarter Indonesian. I only found this out yesterday too.



So, I'm going to catch up with what music she’s produced since I lost track of her 10 years ago. She’s still as beautiful as when she first hopped onto the music scene.

ESTA LATER!